Sunday, September 21, 2008

Mothering Your Nursing Toddler and Hair Pulling

I just finished reading the book "Mothering Your Nursing Toddler". I got it from the La Leche League here. They have a lending library. Isn't that nice? I like when I get to read books for free! Anyhoo, it was a great read. I found it to be just the sort of thing I've been looking to read as Boo and I move into a different stage here. Toddlerhood of course presents some challenges that infancy does not. Boo has a pretty spirited will, which I think is wonderful by the way. It will serve him well in life. So my goal is to guide him through childhood in a way that instills in him morality and all that good stuff without squelching the spirited personality inside. As he gets bigger I find myself having to remind myself to get off my butt and not just yell "no" or "not for Boo" from across the room. Especially challenging right now is his love of hair. Anyone that has really beautiful hair watch out. Boo wants to touch it and play with it. And he's not so gentle, even though he does try to be at times. So we're working on that. Anyways, this book, while about nursing, had enough reminders in it to give me hope that my child will not be pulling hair forever. In fact, this phase will pass all too quickly. So while it's a nuisance, I must remember to be gentle and respectful of him as I educate him in appropriate touch of someone's hair. This is easier some days than others, all depending on how much sleep I've gotten and my current mood, hunger level, etc.. Yelling, instilling fear, and shaming could perhaps squelch the behavior more quickly. But using a gentle approach that is respectful of him as a person will help him to change his behavior. I'd love for him to learn that it hurts others and not pull hair out of his affection for others. I don't want him to stop pulling hair for fear that mommy will be mad at him or he's afraid of being punished. My goal is to use discipline methods that focus on intrinsic reasons for changing behavior as opposed to extrinsic motivators.

I see that this post is turning into a mish mash of several ideas. Oh well, that's the way I write sometimes. Anyway, back to the whole nursing thing. I do love the book that I read and feel that it's got some great information for those who nurse longer. I would definitely recommend this book to anyone considering nursing past a year.

1 comment: