Wednesday, January 23, 2008

The Mommy Wars

Why is it when you become a mom people all of a sudden get so offended about the choices that you make? I don't know why this is on my mind, but it is. I think it's so harmful psychologically how women run each other down based on parenting choices. There are so many choices out there regarding feeding, nurturing, diapering, working, discipline, schooling, medical treatment, vaccinations, etc...Of course there's that part inside of every mom that feels that her way is best. Otherwise, why would she have chosen that route in the first place? Our personality combined with our life experiences lead us to what we feel is best for each child. So why do so many women think that what is best for their child is best for someone else's? I'm not saying that women can't express opinions to other women , because being able to express our opinion is a part of having relationships with others. But this does not usually happen in a respectful, productive manner between many moms. So, without further ado, here's some guidelines for communicating opposing viewpoints to another mom.

1. Ask yourself - Is this opinion WANTED? This is a very important first step. DON'T skip this step.

2. When giving your viewpoint, express it as just that - ONE point of view among many other VALID points of view.

3. Avoid statements that present your viewpoint as what a GOOD mother does (even if that's what you really believe).

4. When presenting your viewpoint, do NOT attack other points of view. Just stick with what you want to express about your own viewpoint.

SKIP THESE STEPS AND YOU WILL ENSURE THAT YOUR OPINION IS NOT LISTENED TO AT ALL.

I haven't had anything happen recently that I can think of that prompted me to post this. But I know this is an ongoing problem in the world of mommies.

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